For some reason I have woken up in a good mood today. I shouldn't be really because I have a stonking headache, a really bad one today. I am tempted to entirely blame the pressure in my head from MS because my eyes feel like they are going to pop out of their sockets but have a sneaky suspicion that it might also have something to do with the three large (read JUMBO) glasses of white wine that I had last night.
Wednesday nights are date night for me and my lovely bloke and we usually end up at the Indian restaurant at the end of our road (walk there, stumble back). The food is amazing and the staff are awesome, last night was no exception.
It was nice to get out and reflect on my day as I had my hospital appointment with the Urologist, which went quite well. He was a lovely chap and to be honest I felt honoured to be able to see him. The reason for this is that as I sat in the packed waiting room I heard the receptionist tell another patient that the Doctor would be reviewing notes and then deciding IF he was going to see you or if you would be just seeing his registrar. I sat there silently seething thinking that if that happened to me then I was going to walk out. I have been fobbed off one too many times in this lovely health care system of ours.
Luckily I mad the "cut" and saw the main guy who turned out to be lovely. Very smiley and easy to talk to. He reviewed my CT scan results and confirmed what I already know, that I have a "dinky" kidney. His words, not mine. I wonder if that is an medical diagnosis? Yes Miss, you have what is known as "Dinky Kidney Disorder"- Ha!
He is referring me for a scan to see if the kidney is functioning as it should and IF it is working at less than 15% they will whip it out. I am hoping not (of course), not because of being scared of surgery or being left with one kidney but purely for vanity reasons of not wanting another scar. Yup, judge away, I am THAT shallow!! I already have a scar on my tummy from a previous surgery and so I don't really want another one or I'll end up looking like a road map.
He said he would just write to me with the results and wouldn't need to see me again if the function was more than 15% unless I wanted him to see me in person. I told him that with all due respect, I am more than happy to tick an "ologist" off my list. I am sick of Doctors so I would rather NOT have another appointment unless it is entirely necessary. It's a shame in a way that he isn't a Neurologist because he had a lovely "bedside" manner.
So now that I am in a better frame of mind (weird how this thing gets you down one day and you are able to make your peace with it the next and yet the symptoms are still present) I have decided that I need to spring into action and start exercising again. It will help me feel better emotionally I think and plus I have gained a bit of weight since I haven't been able to run like I used to and that adds to me feeling a bit crap about myself. I need to lose that if possible, it is only 5-7lbs but it makes a big difference to how I feel about myself and I also want to tone up.
The thing I would like to work on most is my bum. I have never been one of those chicks that asks "does my bum look big in this" because quite frankly I don't really have much of an arse. I think the official term is "pancake bum". I decided (after seeing photos of myself in a tight dress) that I wanted a bigger, curvier "Beyonce" bum.I would be tempted to go for bum implants (feel free to judge the shallowness of this - haters gonna hate!) but I don't think I am brave enough and I am certainly not rich enough so what IS a girl to do? I did some research and found some knickers that have padding in the back. I actually got the idea after watching a reality TV show and I thought why not? Girls wear padded push-up bras or "chicken fillets" to bolster the boobs, why not the derrière too?
So the new padded knickers arrived in the post and I decided to try them out with my new, tight-fitting dress to see how much of a difference they made. Phil was there cracking up laughing at me as I popped the over-sized "chicken fillets" into the pouches on the inside of the knickers. I pulled them up (massive granny pants - not at ALL sexy in any way - think Bridget Jones) and honestly they made NO difference. I put on the dress and it totally was not worth the £20 I spent on them. I couldn't even see the difference. Phil decided to do the " squeeze test" and declared that he hated them, he likes to be able to grope my ACTUAL bottom!
I decided they were complete rubbish and as I took them off, the fillets fell out and plopped onto the floor. Can you imagine if that happened in a public bathroom? What would that look like under the door?? I was literally holding my tummy laughing, it was hilarious. I think I am going to embrace my little bum and maybe just work out to make it more "pert" instead. I will never have Beyonce's backside and until I win the lottery and can consider surgery then I will just have to live with it.
That's me for today folks. The girl with the MS symptoms, dinky kidney and non-curvy bum.
So enough about me, how are YOU?
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