Getting Back To The Gym

Good Morning Bleeps.

I hope you all had a good weekend, I certainly did. We were kid free this weekend so it was just the two of us for most of it, it was like a two-day-long date!

Saturday we went up to Blue Water, which is a lovely big shopping centre here in the South East. We did a little bit of shopping followed by a lovely light lunch of chicken breast with a side salad. I wanted the wild boar burger but I started yet another diet on Saturday because we received our third wedding invitation and it was a wake-up call that I need to get toned up so that I can wear the sort of dresses that I like. I did cheat and have a couple of glasses of wine with lunch but I passed on dessert so surely that just balances it out?!

After lunch we went to watch The Hunger Games.Phil treated us to the the "Gallery", which means you get your own entrance and lovely big, sofa-like seating. You also get chocolates, nachos and muffins, ALL of which I resisted. I know, right?! How good am I?

I am half way through the book and so there was a tiny part of me that was worried about seeing the movie before I had finished reading in case it made me not want to bother but that hasn't at all been the case. I really liked what they did with the film and although I now know how it ends I am still unable to put the book (or in my case, Kindle) down.

Yesterday I did my first ever yoga class. I was so nervous when I woke up, I did my usual symptom inventory list in my head and thankfully I was feeling OK, the only thing bothering me was the side pain and nausea that seems to be with me constantly these days. Phil was going to do it with me (he has done Yoga before) and so I wasn't going by myself, which meant there really wasn't an easy way to back out. I didn't want to back out but I was literally shaking with nerves when I got there. I was also a little worried that the pain might get worse.

I spoke to the teacher and let her know that I am waiting for my official diagnosis and that I didn't know how much I would be able to do. She was great and all through the class kept asking me if I was OK. I managed to keep up and found some of the poses familiar because my old personal trainer used to have me doing some of them. Anyone who thinks that Yoga is easy hasn't been to a class like this, I came out sweaty and my legs shaking as if I had been for a long run. Granted I haven't done any exercise in months but still, she put us through our paces.

My body did sort of rebel in the afternoon, my face went numb and there was an electrical storm raging wild through my limbs. The black floaters in my eyes were plentiful although I can't be sure if this is because I pushed myself hard in the class or if this would have happened anyway. I wasn't about to let it put me off though and called the gym to schedule my next class, which will be tomorrow. The one good thing was that the pain in my stomach/side was gone. Maybe those pain relieving endorphins had worked their magic?

Today I can hardly move, I feel like I have been hit by a bus. I am hurting in muscles that I didn't even know I had. Being an ex runner, I am used to feeling this sort of thing in my legs but I never felt such stiffness in my upper body. I am taking this as a good sign that I worked my muscles, they will tone up if they like it or not!

For any of you out there that are in a similar situation as me as far as feeling like you want to do something to increase your fitness but are no longer able to go to the gym, if you are able to find a yoga class near you then try it out. My sister has been recommending it forever (she is a huge Yoga fan and says that doing Yoga got her in the best shape of her life) and so I think she will be pleased for me, I can't wait to tell her about it.

So enough about me, how are YOU?

The Secret

Good Morning Bleeps.

Yesterday I tweeted out to the universe asking who had turned my blood to iced water. This is a sensation that I get quite a lot recently, sometimes in my head (you may remember me talking about the ice cube in my brain) and often in my arms and legs. It literally feels as if my blood is running cold. I got tweeted back by a friend who said "oh bless you" to which I replied that I wasn't bothered by it, just taking it in my stride. He commented that I was "strong" (I don't think I am) but I let him in on the fact that I certainly have my days where I am full swing throwing a pity party for one (balloons and all) but yesterday wasn't going to be one of them.

I was still riding high (although hung over) from my great night in London and NO WAY was I going to let any symptoms get me down. The sun was shining and my mood was good. I have also started reading a book that was recommended to me by my lovely friend Lisa called The Secret, which basically applies the principle that whatever we put "out there" in the Universe is what you will get back. So for example if you are wearing a white dress and you constantly send out thoughts of "I bet I spill something on this white dress" you undoubtedly WILL spill something. 

So with this in mind I decided that I would not send out any messages of "I hope I don't feel any worse" or "I wish these feelings would go away" and instead I would think of "I feel great, the sun is shining and today is a good day". Logically this would mean that the Universe should actually send me a good day. I think that is how it works, although I must confess that I am only on the first chapter and have a lot of reading to do yet.

We decided to have an early night (what is it about getting older that causes hangovers to last for days instead of hours?) and was in bed by nine. As I went to bed my vision was really squiffy. The black floaters in my eyes seemed to have decided to get friendly with each other and hold hands, creating a dark grey, cloud-like disturbance to my vision. Oh well, a good night sleep would sort that out.

We watched the TV show "Embarrassing Bodies" in bed and by "watch" I mean cower under the blankets while people showed their most intimate body issues on camera (I have never seen or heard of a Buried Penis before and hope to never again!). If you are not in the UK then you should YouTube the show, it is quite a "treat". Last week there was a woman who was putting a hosepipe up her bum and giving herself coffee enemas, who does that? Yikes!

I fell off to a lovely sleep shortly after ten and didn't wake up until seven. For a change I got a lovely nine full hours of slumber. You would think I would be on top of the world today, right? Wrong!

I have woken up this morning feeling awful. There is pressure in my head and my right eyeball feels like it is being squeezed from behind. I am so dizzy and feel nauseas. The numbness in my face is back along with tingling in my lips. My legs are heavy and full of iced water again. I also have the fog over my eyes and I am exhausted, as if I haven't rested for days.

I am really trying to not let this get me down today. I am sending the Universe a very important message today of "I have work to do and so I feel great". Hopefully the Universe will send me the ACTUAL feeling of "great" back to me. While I am at it I wonder if I sit and think of how wealthy I am, will I win the lottery? I think I need to chat to my friend Lisa and find out how this works.

I really do think that your frame of mind can determine what sort of day you have but it is really hard when you feel like crap to feel positive. I told Phil the other day that I don't think my symptoms bother me any more, that I am an observer of them but they will no longer make me sad. I said that maybe finally I had "let it go" and reached the acceptance stage of living with a chronic illness. Today I am not so sure, today I am feeling fed up that even though I had a great night sleep, I feel worse today than I did yesterday. Maybe my body is just rebelling because I gave it a good pasting with alcohol on Sunday but is that what is going to happen now? A good night = pay for it later? That sort of sucks to be honest.

I think I need to read some more of this book because although I haven't slipped completely back into the pity party today, I am sort of standing at the back door, holding a balloon and am tempted to go in. I simply do not have time for it today however as I have websites to work on. I have to keep the positive energy flowing.

So enough about me, how are YOU?