The Right Direction

Good Morning Bleeps.

How the heck are we all?  I am super-duper tingly today and my face is numb as usual. I  have black floaters in my eyes and the cold pressure is back in my head (on the back left side). I also have this flipping pain in my right side that has been constant for twelve days now.  *sigh*

I have my second yoga class today and I am sitting here thinking HOW? How the heck am I going to get through this class when quite frankly I am struggling to get on and off the toilet with these sore leg muscles from my class on Sunday? Too much information maybe? Oh well, you know me, I do like to share -  ha!

I can hardly move my arms (I can't tell which muscles are hurting most, the biceps or the triceps) so the Sun Salutation should be interesting. In case you don't know what that is, you basically go through a range of movements and one of them involves lowering yourself down (like a push up) and then pushing back up again. Yeah, right! That will be a challenge since lifting my coffee cup is making me feel like a weight lifter today.

The upside is that since I started my diet on Saturday I have already lost a couple of pounds - woohoo! Two down, six to go! I'm definitely heading in the right direction. In fact, I just treated myself and ordered some new fancy undies and a pretty dress to celebrate (that's a good enough excuse for me). Some might say the new lingerie is more of a pressie for Phil (and they would be right haha) but he deserves it for suffering through yoga with me.

Yesterday I told my daughter Kassidy that I had ordered a Yogalates DVD for when I can't get to classes. Her reply was "Mum, you already have that".

"No I don't." I replied.

"Mum, it's in my room. You have it." She answered.

Bugger! That is SO like me. Order a DVD with great intentions, never take it out the wrapper and forget I own it altogether.

I have never actually re-ordered one before though, this was a first.

Luckily there are about eight DVDs in the Yogalates series and the one I ordered (Yogalates for weight loss) is different to the one I forgot I owned, which is Yogalates for Body Toning. Cool, I am building up a collection - might work better if I actually use it though!

I am usually quite good when I set my mind to something although I tend to be an "all or nothing" person. I am either stuffing cheeseburgers and chips or I am starving myself. I am usually the same with exercise too but I need to re-adjust my attitude with Yoga. I have a friend who is a Yoga teacher and she reminded me yesterday that Yoga is a journey, I won't be able to just pop up on to my hands on the first class. The head strong, competitive Leo in me is NOT happy about this but I will have to learn some patience as I build up strength.

I am trying to not think about next week too much. I am sort of dreading getting my results. I have a good friend (Judy) who is also getting her diagnosis on the same day. She has to endure a 90 minute MRI beforehand and then the Doctor will interpret the images for her right there and then, letting her know if it is indeed MS that she is dealing with. In some ways, because she has become such a special friend to me, I feel that we are sharing this journey even though she is on the other side of the globe. I will be mentally holding her hand, as I know she will be mine.

I am not sure what I want to hear - does that sound weird? In one way I want to hear "The lumbar puncture and spine MRI came back clear so it is probably not MS" but another part of me wants an explanation to all of these symptoms. I am also nervous about starting the whole process again. I have been in limbo forever and so the thought of having to start all over is quite depressing. I know I will go back to my GP and he will refer me to a Rheumatologist for Lupus screening but goodness knows how long the waiting list will be and I can't afford to pay private again. I suppose I shouldn't jump the gun but it is hard to not play the "what if" game. All I know is something is going on - I have the brain MRI to prove it. At least it is nice to know it isn't in my head, well, actually it is but you know what I mean.

Anyway, for today I will just concern myself with trying to move like a normal person and not a robot and get through Yoga. I am looking forward to doing something good for my body again. I am hoping that it sort of makes up for all the Pinot Grigio I had last night.

So enough about me, how are YOU?